Archives for the month of: August, 2013

When I’m running ten minutes late for work I save time by leaving the house without a shirt. Not really. The train that pulls into my subway station at 8:37 delivers a white male in his twenties who does not wear shirts. He is pale, plump, hairy, and alternates between a black leather vest and a light wash denim vest. It doesn’t bother me. The first few times that the train pulled into the station the doors opened and he walked off the car he was wearing the unbuttoned black leather vest. The best conclusion (or the most entertaining) I could make was that this man was on his way home from working at a kinky bar/sex dungeon.

Then he started wearing the denim vest. People can surprise you. I had a label, a reason, an understanding. Then he wore a denim vest. I’m having trouble imagining the denim vest at his previous place of employment. It’s harder to wipe down.

What if he chooses to live shirtless? When we pass during our morning commute he is  on his way to a regular 9-5 job. Once he is one block from the office he puts on a shirt. He is being honest with himself: he hates wearing shirts so he doesn’t wear them.

Do you honor your truth regardless of social norms? Eff the labels in your head. No one pays attention to shirtless man because it’s New York and they’re used to seeing him every morning. They recognize that his lack of shirt does not impact their lives.

Listen to your truth and honor it.

“And I can’t change-even if I tried. Even if I wanted to…”


I’m employed by a company located in a hip part of Brooklyn. It blows my mind that I share office space with people who bring their dogs to work WHILE wearing cut-off denim shorts! I don’t even own a dog. It’s 100% aspirational: don’t look like you’re working while at work. Eff professionalism!!! Do the ladies wearing cut-offs on week days dress in Ann Taylor suits on the weekends?!? I can’t handle the truth. This is the split second when I miss the Vera Bradley-American Eagle-Ugg baloney of the ‘burbs- strictly because it requires no thought at all.

There are also some not-so-hip people scurrying on and off of the elevator during your standard arriving at work/leaving for lunch/leaving for 3pm Starbucks/leaving for the day times. Today, a girl shouted to her friend, “I lovvvvve backpacks right now. There are so many great ones out there. I just bought a nice leather one on” I own two backpacks and I’m currently considering a third but, I didn’t know anyone below the age of fifty still articulated “dot com” when referencing well-known websites. Is there any other Amazon? No one gives an eff about the actual Amazon Rainforest. Do you recall when the general population worried about protecting the trees and ecosystems south of the border a decade ago? I don’t. I do remember the spin-off trend: WWF panda t-shirts. Whatever. My point is that people can surprise you. She had me at backpacks then she lost me at “dot com.” The man standing near the door appeared to be upset by the whole conversation. It had never occurred to him that four minutes of his life would be taken from him in the name of leather backpacks from He will weep softly into his pillow tonight.

Occasionally, your fellow man will surprise you in a lovely fashion. When you reconnect with an old friend and you expect it to be awkward, but instead it’s warm and rich and you see a glimmer of your old self while talking to the old friend… It’s like coming home. When that old friend offers to do you a favor it’s like coming home and being greeted at the door with warm banana bread. That last part was a shout-out to my Mom. Hi Mom! Please mail my boyfriend a loaf of banana bread as payment so that he will continue to date me through the holiday season.

I would like to dedicate this post to D.D. who was a close friend during my undergrad studies. We have lost touch, but she is in the process of doing me a favor AND urged me to reboot my blog. She stroked my ego. Old friends are the best. Don’t feel guilty about losing touch. If you truly have that spark it will still be there after years apart (even if she has moved on to other friends).